How to tie a toga for a party…

So many people don’t know how to make a toga. Shame on y’all.

1) Find 2 belts and a bed sheet of your choice. One should be toga-relevant. The other one doesn’t matter. 

2) Fold sheet hotdog style.

3) Place belt inside, in the fold. 

4) Belt it one-shoulder style.

5) Rearrange fabric so it’s evenly dispersed. 

6) Belt other belt around your waist to give your body some shape. 

7) RAGE.


So I started my Saturday with that process. Made an 8-shot drink. Downed it. Grabbed 2 cups of juice when I got to our social with KS. Poor choices. YOLO.  

Tried to target el presidente. Then went for my ex. Avoided the phone calls from my regular, hoping for variety. Apparently he threw up on himself and was broadcasting an SOS. My bad. 

Had what was surely an exciting, intelligent conversation with the brothers outside on sober duty. El oh el. 

Decided I was too drunk for life and went home to snuggle with my pillows.

Drunk-buzzed till 3 the next day. Enjoyed the moment at Olive Garden with my partner in crime, her other half, and my regular. We plotted an epic 3 en la manana capture the flag event to be executed in the upcoming days. KS is going to hate us. 


Updates to follow. 


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