Monthly Archives: April 2014

Hot Tub Club

Happy finals week! I’m that bitch at the pool that’s already done while everyone else is indoors studying their lives away. 

My red solo cup was filled with popsicles and rum yesterday. 

Then I built my own pizza and sipped some beers at a sorority family dinner. 

Then I went to a Mexican restaurant and ordered a monster margarita. 

Then I proceeded to pass out at an early 10pm. The alcohol won.  

When my roommate tried to communicate with me around midnight, I told her she “wasn’t allowed in the hot tub club.”

 

I wish I knew what that was. 

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“We Will Go Down With This Ship”

So I went on a fraternity beach weekend. The first night was an exciting shitshow. We frolicked around the beach and did some miscellaneous shenanigans. I crossed new experiences off my bucket list. 

We snuck into a neighbor’s hot tub. 

I skinny dipped in the ocean. 

I slept on an air mattress that really didn’t want to cooperate. 

The next day we participated in a datelock party. My date, a bandana, and a fifth of Bacardi was interrupted by cops. 

We dumped out so much alcohol it made me want to cry. Half the people peaced out that night. We chose to go down with the ship. 

We visited some friends in the local area the next morning and spent the day getting shwasted. I frolicked around the beach in my underwear because I didn’t bring a swimsuit. Go me. 

I loved it. 

My bad.

So formal was this weekend. I dressed in my neon, sequined, tribal patterned dress and proceeded to drink.

Finished a fifth, grabbed some tequila. Made it to formal.

Tore up the dance floor with my adorable date. Started to feel sick from all the movement. After a failed attempt to locate a bathroom, I ended up throwing up right as I walked in. Apparently some of that got on a sister. Go me.

They shipped me right back to the campus on the first bus home. I cried the whole way. Then jumped into the shower – dress and all.

Boyfriend joined me in the shower as I bawled my eyes out and questioned my life choices.

Recovered from the situation – just in time for him to also get sick. Man, we make a grand pair 😉

 

At least I got a good Instagram picture.

Life is a Party

Some highlights from this weekend:

Gained a boyfriend. Lost some bragging rights. 

Made Jell-O shots. Played shot roulette and got white girl wasted. 

Some friends came to town. I’m sure they thought I was mega popular. Everywhere we went people were yelling my name. 

Had a blast at the KS slip n’ slide. Ventured to DSPLXA for a foam party. Avoided ZL1. 

Hung out at the giant puddle that was the KA slip n’ slide. 

Chugged some platinums. Downed some jello. 

Drunk makeup. Went to the school’s concert. Fought to the front of the crowd and just kind of fell asleep. But that’s ok. I saw it all on Snapchat and from what I heard, it wasn’t even that great. 

Apparently I started running with my BFF and we just kind of fell onto some people. Good stuff.